Lapses of lingy…

The other day I turned on the telly and stumbled upon an item song from the 70’s (sepia tone and all) on some Hindi movie channel. And guess who was gazing lecherously at Rekha and some other Bollywood starlet as they wiggled their ample behinds, as if there was no tomorrow?

Our very own actor-turned-politician-turned-upholder of Indian values/morals/culture: Shatrughan Sinha, who recently went to town about banning the IPL cheerleaders! His eyes twinkled as they creepily followed the wiggling contours of the female anatomy (which, mostly looked like it was being electrocuted).

Our politicians have their priorities screwed up. They are rake up a storm about skimpily clad women, when they should be busting their asses to make sure our tax money is well-spent by improving infrastructure, protecting farmers, eradicating poverty, solidifying the drainage system (so we don’t drown during a flood), providing employment in the hinterland, checking pedophilia and child labour, et al.

Here’s a piece by dad on how Goan MLAs went on a  recent trip to Singapore. They want to learn good governance from the Singaporeans. 

On a different note, Reliance Broadband has vanished with Rs 500. Apparently, there is no feasibility in my area. But this I get to know (because I spent half a day chasing) AFTER they encash the cheque.

Share

Enjoyed catching up with one of my married girlfriends, yesterday. We knew each other all of five seconds (read two weeks) in college, because she dropped out as soon as she got admission to the pharmacy college. I recall her sending me a letter every two weeks for the next couple of years. She writes okay. But what’s memorable is the stationary. In those times of drab-as-ditchwater airmail, the pretty paper and envelopes she used to write on, helped brighten up a dull day of yawn-worthy lectures by yawn-worthy lecturers.

My pal whipped up a feast. Chicken. Beef Mince. Lots of veggies. Rice. Rotis. Dal. This we washed it all down with cheap Goan wine. In the morning, a chauffeur-driven car dropped me to office. I rate the hospitality as five on five.   
 
Also, here’s a nice random read on 10 excellent reasons to be single right now

Share

A stockbroker friend of mine was enticing me into investing in some stocks.

“You should invest in companies you like. Maybe some that manufacture bags and shoes, stuff that women like to buy,” he said. “Hmmm, I would like to invest in a piece of George Clooney,” I responded. ‘That’s an interesting asset,” he observed.

On a different note, my pal Al has finally flown away to another clime and the days of ‘me time’ are back. Some of my friends get a little antsy when I give my ‘me time/alone time’ excuse for not meeting them. But everyone needs ‘me time’. And I mean quality ‘me time’, when you have the bandwidth to read, write, stare blankly into space, cook, window shop and introspect on the complexities of life.

Share

Last month I got an e-mail from this tarot card reader in the US (maybe a quack) warning me that a period of transit is upon me from March 27 to April 25. Of course, this was just a teaser. She wanted me to cough up 60 dollars for a more specific reading. Since, I am a cheapskate I did not invest this amount in the powers of tarot.

However, her prophecy had a somewhat psychosomatic effect on me and I have been ‘acting’ upon her advice, milking my period of transition to the fullest on all fronts — professional, extracurricular, person, et al.

A good friend came back into my life and his playful criticism has jerked me out of my scatty reverie. One bright Sunday he wanted to help me put my life in order, and I said I wanted to sleep. “Sleep at night,” he barked and I obeyed.

Then the other day I was cribbing about some work saga and he barked again,” No one is dead right?”
And I quit cribbing. He lost a sister, and now NOTHING else worries him.

As John Wayne said: A man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do.

Touche!

Share

My dad’s just written a piece for a site called Goasearch.com. It’s a good concept for Goans to have a platform to express their views, opinions, et al. But most of the other pieces on the site are garbage. You have headlines like ‘One dead on Miramar beach’ and ‘Goa – Lifestyle & people.’, and the pieces sermonise and mostly end up going no where, in terms of the plot.

My dad’s piece is the only one with something substantial to say (though there are several typos and the style is very Physics teacher’. But it’s precise and a little tongue in cheek: How I got my Ration Card

I like the disclaimer at the end of the piece. Shows how little we expect from the Goa government.

Share

I sometimes find the use of the smiley on e-mail/chat/SMS, pretty spooky. I am referring to the traditional happy type, which is cute in doses.

For instance, one fine day I receive an e-mail pointing out an error by yours truly. Am all for pointing them out, but what does the smiley imply? Is the person laughing at me or with me?

Then the other day, a friend of mine used a smiley three times in three sentences on chat! I got the impression he was trying to imply a sort of ‘inner coolness’. As in ‘I am cool and nothing affects me’. Now, this friend means a lot to me but his excessive use of smileys has me a little worried. He is an articulate chap, so, why this overdose of smileys? Is he trying to camouflage some pent up emotion — like anger or even rage?

And just the other day, an acquaintance complimented and insulted me in the same breath via SMS, his sentence was followed by…a smiley. This seemed to imply ‘here’s a compliment but just so it does not go to your head, I am adding this other line’. What immediately came to mind was a jester who is mocking me with a minx-like expression. Shivers!

And there’s one more type of smiley moment, which is really annoying, especially, when you in the middle of a bitch-ridden daywhen people praise themselves (and I mean when your current state of mind has been communicated articulately enough to one’s current chat respondent).

‘Hey, my job is REALLY AND I MEAN REALLY fantastic ’, “I’m going on this assignment to Singapore/Honolulu, et al ’, I just bought a new car, it only costs me 28 lakhs ’. Grrrr!

Share

Just received an e-mailer from Air Deccan, which is currently advertising flights @ Rs 99.

Out of curiosity I tabulated the ticket price for a flight to Goa.

The official fare for April 24^th is Rs 99. Once you factor in the Fuel Surcharge NR(Rs 1,800), Tax- Passenger Service Fee (Rs 225) and Congestion Surcharge (Rs 150), the final amount is Rs 2,274. Oh, and there’s an insurance fee of Rs 99, too (wondering what is insured, exactly)!

On a different note, we have a new baby in the family. His name is Eric and he looks like his mum.

Turns out I am no good with traditional baby compliments. The last mummy I complimented misconstrued my calling her son a ‘a cute little mouse’, as an insult, just for a few seconds, though.

Share

The new laptop is Flamingo Pink. Not that pink features anywhere in my list of favourite colours. But the red shade is not cherry-enough. Yellow is plain dirty! Green is lame. Black inspires a heat attack! Blue is the dullest blue ever. And I am staying away from glossy because Al has predicted the invasion of the fingerprints!

On a different note, Dan In Real Life (on DVD) proved to be an endearing watch. The pace slackens a wee bit in the second half. But overall it has some pretty eccentric character sketches in the lead roles. And it has some nice lines like ‘Love is not a feeling, it’s an ability’, and the like. The establishing scene in the bookshop was cute.Now, why don’t we meet clever, good looking, quirky people in bookstores? Sigh!

Dropped in to Candies near Palinaka the other day. High decibel levels. But a variety of food to choose from. Burgers, sandwiches, desserts, cutlets, croquet, et al. Basically, the whole ‘mac-what men’ menu. It’s a nice-ish place to have a filling meal for 90 bucks. On the flipside, it is full of garrulous teenagers, which makes it impossible to hear yourself think. Sources inform me that the garden upstairs has good make-out potential. But you shall be in the vicinity of pimply-faced teens with raging hormones.

Also, recently kicked off a new series on women from all walks of life. It’s called ‘the other side of me’. The first piece features a woman who manages the moolah of the rich and famous.

Share

Last Friday we headed to Aurus in Juhu, and it lived up to my expectations, completely — pretentious and a total rip off!

The twit at the entrance asked us, with his fake accent, ‘ in what name have you made a reservation?’

‘No, er…we were told that we couldn’t make a reservation.’

“Maybe you got the wrong number, ” he tells us! I was appalled. We glared at him and he let us in, finally.

The food was delicious (entrees, appetisers, sauces, breads and all) and the jazz standards playing in the background were soothing, and a far cry from the usual stuff irrelevant stuff we get to hear. But the portions were meagre. And the sound system wasn’t geared up for the electronic jazz beats of Jalebi Cartel, post 10.30 pm.

As we left the venue, dinner and a couple of drinks later, the same twit at the door (with fake accent) was yelling at the entrance,” everyone move out, nandini needs medical care”. No one was paying attention and the place was teeming with more and more humans. I wanted to run away!

Give me Blue Frog any day(except for the Rs 300 non-cover ‘fee’ after 9 pm). The cocktails are fantastic. The decor is edgy. And you can wear something the cat dragged in, and still saunter in.

And yes, on the way out at Aurus, a couple of nerds were groping in the dark. Eeeooooowww!

Share

My dad made a rather penetrating statement the other day. He said all finances companies and corporations in general, thrive on the ignorance of the people. Yep, customer service in India is F&^ed UP!!!!!

Yeah, I get it that they have to field a dozen angst-ridden customers every day. But could we have a little empathy, first?

Share