Was just telling a friend that there was a positive side effect to dad’s ulcerative colitis episode — I got to spend some quality time with my sis. While growing up we never got to spend much time together. I went to school in Muscat and she went to a special school for children with disabilities in Goa.
She’s 75 per cent deaf in one ear and 50 per cent deaf in the other, and when she speaks it doesn’t sound anything like most of us (which is not such a big deal because most people I know sound odd either way). She uses a hearing aid to boost her hearing levels.
Post Class X, I moved to Goa for further studies, the primary reason being that I could now be closer to my sister. However, she lived in a boarding school and I lived in hostel, so we did not meet that often. We have always been close even though we are quite different from one another in both looks and temperament.
Like many people with a disability (or without one too), she can be very stubborn, and dealing with these stubborn spells can be a very exasperating experience. However, I’ve learnt a little trick on how to handle stubborness. If she says no, I just let it go. But she’s quite impressionable, so I sneakily try to impress her with a new idea so she will buy it 
And impressions must be made – just until she steps outside of her shell. She fears the unknown immensely as wells as social situations, because she does not want to make communication mistakes in front of people. BTW a recent survey indicated that more people have a fear of social situations than spiders.
I know that sometimes she feels lonely and underconfident. But she MUST learn that it is okay to make mistakes, and these are the only stepping stones to independence and maybe, self-discovery.
One of the communication problems we faced during my dad’s hospital days was communicating with her when she was at school (she works as a volunteer at a school for mentally challenged kids) because she cannot use the telephone. But thank God for SMS. Now, she has her own a mobile phone and it’s given her a tremendous amount of confidence. Cousins and friends who would communicate with her only so far and no further, (I think they just did not know how) now text her regularly to find out what she is doing and vice versa.
I want her to live a full life, strive for more, be independent, be confident and understand that the world is her oyster, if only she wants it to be.
I think it’s great that you spent time in Goa with her.
Lovely post!
I have a grand aunt who is disabled like your sister. She doesn’t hear at all, but over the years, her talking skills have improved somewhat. She reads and writes in three languages, is impeccable with her tailoring and senses immediately when we’re talking about her in her presence. Infact, she home-schooled me for two years when I was a child. I think my grandfather was pretty progressive to have a disabled daughter educated to the extent that she could support herself…..in the 1930s. Today, she is over 70 years old and a lot more alert and active than I am!
I hope I get to meet your sister soon
Hey girl, am really impressed by your grandaunt and your grandfather (though I think you mean your great grandfather
)
Am thinking of bringing my sis to Mumbai for a bit maybe towards the latter end of the year when my dad is better. I think she needs exposure and and also maybe some interactions with people like her who are thriving well.
You can meet her then
hey Meriil…
Am glad for u girl!!
Maya