Yesterday, we communed at Altaf’s for his annual Id get-together. Ankur and he badgered me about why I’m bothering to dress up (not in the literal sense) to the nines these days. They think it’s because I want to impress a man. I tried to drum it into their heads that fashion for me is about self-expression. It matters, not at all, whether you are sporting Prada, Choo or Tarun. The point is can you carry it off the damn thing? Or will your dastardly slouch ruin the effect of these exquisite creations? Anyways, coming to my obsessive friends. They want me to ‘style’ them.
Now, coming back to what impresses men. Initially, I thought it was all about how you look. This could be because I was frightfully fat in school, courtesy a lack of exercise, lots of Pepsi and marathon chocolate chip cookie sessions. I was usually the medium between my two hot (but ironically plump) best friends and the male classmates. My school crush liked my best friend. However, I don’t remember pining too much. I accepted such unfairness with a pinch of salt, and drowned my sorrows in my favourite book of the moment, The Thornbirds. The idea that thin is attractive sub-consciously stayed with me for a long time to come. It does not help that one’s mother is also obsessed with one’s weight.
Anyways, the other day a friend pointed out that I am obsessive about my weight. I never quite thought of it like that. But I realise that deep down, how good I feel is often related to how thin I feel. Not a healthy trend at all. However accepting the problem is half the battle won. And yes, it’s not just about looks. Now, it’s about looks and brains 
On a different note, a good (single) male friend and me, who have regular conversations on love, relationships and similar jazz, have mutually decided that we are not interested in pandering to BS (aka bullshit) from potential love interests. Examples of BS include being commitment-phobic, being insensitive, being overtly cynical, dishonest, having emotional baggage that you just can’t let go of etc.
We also decided that having physical designs is acceptable, because one always has a choice about whether to respond or not. But packaging one’s interest in the lacy trimmings of a relationship is not. It’s unnecessary and a colossal waste of time. Harsh but true.
hmm so you too have a weight obsessed mother? Mine took me to the doctors complaining that I was always hungry and too fat at the tender age of 6 month- the result was no more milk but porridge and the feeling of a sticky lump sliding down my throat stayed with me for life!
The Thorn Birds by Colleen McCullough, that was my all time favourite. Still remember the movie, watched that first and later was hooked onto the book a whole of 1300 pages if I remember correctly. Amazing story on the spins in Maggie’s life….. darn sad ending though
Btw whassup ?